I was getting pretty sick of Adrian’s criticisms of me at band practices, I don’t like being spoken to as if I’m something he found on the bottom of his shoe. And I wasn’t the only one; Jean Marc, the drummer, had had enough too.

A few weeks ago Michel, the old singer, decided to come back, in spite of still having severe tinnitus; he’s very different to sing with from Jean Michel, whose style I’d got used to over the last 2 years and I knew it’d be a challenge. Jean Michel told me to sing as I would with him, so I was surprised when, at the end of the first song, Adrian barked at me that I was too loud, as well as various other faults. This was too much for me, so I called him out over it. He’s someone who’s happy to dish out criticism, but can’t take it, so at the end of the practice he flounced off, like some ageing prima donna, announcing later that he’d quit the group.

Lots of messages flew around over the following few days and I was told I’d have to go to see Adrian, to sort things out; but as he wouldn’t even read messages I sent, this seemed rather pointless. Célia, a keyboard player who Adrian had just brought into the group, offered to arbitrate. We drove 2 hours to a meeting place chosen by Adrian, who arrived nearly half an hour late, by motorbike.

He spat a few orders at me about how I’d have to behave in future, as he wouldn’t be speaking to me and I needn’t bother to speak to him, then started to put his helmet back on. Célia and I pointed out that this would simply cause a bad atmosphere and that we hadn’t driven all that way for that. A very difficult discussion ensued, with Adrian trying to leave several times, but Celia took the keys from his bike. Eventually, I thought we’d got somewhere, Adrian put his helmet on, then deliberately walked straight into me, shoving me out of the way and shouting “move”! I was so shocked that I didn’t say anything; no man has ever behaved like that to me before.

I was so angry, I thought it’d be better if I didn’t go to band practice that weekend, but I was told in no uncertain terms that I had to turn up. I’m pleased to be able to say that, in spite of feeling very uncomfortable and in spite of Adrian glowering at me, I played and sang very well; however that evening I received a message telling me that they didn’t like my attitude and could no longer work with me.

I’ve seen Jean Marc and his wife since; he spoke up for me at the following rehearsal and told them what he thinks of their behaviour towards me, but stopped short of leaving (I can understand, it’s his main social outlet of the week). Apparently Adrian has lied, (in the words of Mandy Rice, ” well, he would, wouldn’t he?”), denying shoving me and saying he stayed on his bike all the time; but, having got over the initial shock and upset, I’m pleased not to have anything more to do with a man like that.

I’ve been asked to play some Christmas songs at the ladies’ club Christmas lunch this week and was invited to spend this afternoon at the house of a friend and her partner. They’re part of a folky/Irish band. I’m not sure if they’re actually looking for a guitarist/ vocalist at the moment and they need to speak to the third member of the group, but it was a very enjoyable afternoon. I’ll wait and see…..